Solace for Confusion

 We can get lost in the weeds if we try to define “God”. Who among us can understand that which is limitless? 

I don’t think I’ve ever not believed in a Higher Power, but I often felt like I was on the outside looking in. There can be a lot of smugness when encountering someone who claims to have the answers. How is that possible? Is that Power small enough to comprehend?

Agnostics may be okay with the idea of maybe yes/maybe no, and atheists have shut their minds to any possibility of connection, so there can’t also exist an ease of a sense of belief. “If there is a God, why is there suffering?”, is the stumbling block. I don’t know, but perhaps we witness or experience suffering to develop a compassion for others experiencing the same. Perhaps a simple prayer - “what can I do here?” - can lift a burden for a moment. 

My burden of alcoholism was lifted from me. That allowed me to find out who I am and what I can contribute to others. The question of “why me?” was replaced by the realization that this human experience is full of lessons, and that all is temporary. I readily admit that that impermanence can feel like it is forever sometimes, but when I look back at my life, I see the evidence to the contrary.

I can cry out “why?”, but for me, the solace from confusion is in asking “what is mine to do?”, followed by taking the next indicated action.